Emerging…

Posted By on December 20, 2010

from the pain of a rejection. I know it’s part of this business. I know I’m a professional, and I can get it right, but I’m frustrated when I get it wrong more than once. And I’ve managed to get it not-right-enough three times. I was already in something of a crisis of confidence, and this hasn’t helped.

But–you either pick yourself up and move on, or you give up and refuse to grow. I’ve been picking myself up. I want to grow. The worst part has been the certainty that the lovely editor I’ve been working with will tire of my efforts as I’ve kept getting it not-right-enough. Can you say counter-productive?

The last thing you need in your head when you’re trying to write bigger and better and free up your own emotions so that you can create a literal bath of emotion for a reader is a small voice going, “but, is this right? Is this going to be so wrong that she’s going to ask you to lose her email address?” Not very freeing, is it?

No.

Last night I started Chapter 1, v. 3. I’m not proud of being on v. 3, but v.3 is closer than anything I’ve produced in my trek toward a new line. Even I can tell that. So, I’m not going to rattle on here for too long. I have v. 3 to expand!

Growing is much nicer than nagging away at my self with doubt!

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